A True Rebel
by Tortured Hylian Soul
Summary: Lloyd is a rebel, and don't you ever forget it! [Pure C.R.A.C.K.]


Came up with this lame idea while playing Tales of the Abyss. 0-o I'm expecting criticism...

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"I'm the guardian of the oasis. Water is precious in the desert, so we can't waste a drop!"

"Precious, huh?" The brunette cackled evilly, rubbing his hands together as a plan was calculated in his tiny little mind. A crimson-gloved finger was shoved in the little Triet boy's face. "Well just you wait, random sand-child that I've never met! I'm Lloyd Irving, the most awesomest swordsman from here to the fortuneteller's tent seven feet from us, and I mean business! You're looking at the face of a true rebel!"

The little "guardian" boy merely blinked with wide eyes as Lloyd's finger was moved away from his face. "… I'm the guardian of the oasis. Water is pre-!"

"_Lloyd_!" The sorry excuse for a swordsman was dragged back by the small, pale hand of his best friend. "Stop bugging the civilians! We're supposed to be here to stock up on weapons and hair gel for Zelos!" Lloyd ripped himself from Genis's grip, resulting in him landing squarely on a conveniently placed cactus. The half-elf sighed as he pulled his cursing friend back up.

"You can't tell me what to do!" Lloyd yelled, breaking away from Genis before climbing to the top of a nearby palm tree in record time. "Nobody can tell me what to do, I'm a _rebel_!" At this time, poor Colette was unfortunate enough to walk by.

"… What is Lloyd doing?" she asked, peering up as Genis pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Lloyd thinks he's a rebel again."

"Oh… Well I'm here to support him, no matter what!"

"… I'm worried about you Colette…"

There was a hollow _thud _as Lloyd fell to the sand headfirst. "_I'm a rebel_!" He then proceeded to run to the water's edge, jumping up and down with his hands in fists as Genis sighed and Colette smiled vacantly. "_REBEL, REBEL, REBEL!_"

"Lloyd, please just stop-."

"_You can't tell me what to do Genis_! I'm going to show this kid who's boss!"

Colette cheered. "You can do it, Lloyd!" Genis began to wonder how his friends could survive without brains.

"_REBEL_!" Lloyd finally managed to turn to the water's edge, taking a deep breath, and…

… Proceeded to spit directly into the oasis.

Genis gaped. Colette grinned. A merchant beamed as he scammed poor Sheena out of her gald. Lloyd sauntered his way towards his friends; whistling a tune, chin high in the air.

"How do you like _that?_" he exclaimed, grinning like he had just gotten away with stealing the largest gem on this side of Sylvarant. When his friends failed to respond, he stood still, subject to staring eyes. "… What? Are you impressed by how much of a rebel I am?" he asked, striking a pose. Genis rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, Lloyd, a true rebel. I'm sure that you open the popcorn bag from the other side, too." Lloyd grinned.

"You bet I do!" Genis just stared.

Unfortunately, the "guardian of the oasis" was not as happy as our hero of the two worlds was. "THAT BOY POLLUTED OUR ONLY WATER SOURCE! GET HIM AND HIS COMPANIONS!!!" Several other citizens suddenly appeared out of nowhere, approaching the trio menacingly. Colette and Genis stepped back cautiously. Lloyd, however, decided to stand and show off his "rebelness".

"Only source? What? There's an ocean, like, 200 feet away from this town! I mean honestly! All you have to do is boil-!" The boy was dragged away as his two best friends ran with him in tow, the people of Triet close behind.

Raine soon came into view. "What have you three done this-?" As Raine was pulled into the trio of fleeing heroes, the other members of the group soon fell victim to the growing snowball of people.

"Hey guys, what's going on-?"

"What are you-?"

"Huh-?"

"…-"

And so on.

Panting and exhausted, the party collapsed several yards away from the outskirts of Triet. Genis was the first to recover.

"Way to go, Lloyd. We were just thrown out of Triet because of your sheer stupidity. What are you going to do now, wear your shirt backwards?" Lloyd, however, was giddy and grinning with excitement.

"Are you freaking kidding?! Now I want to know what happens when you _pee _in the oasis! … _REBEL!!!_"

And Lloyd was never heard from again.


End file.
